Today I started chemo. This is my third journey with chemo as a copilot to cancer. In my previous battles it’s been via iv or port. This time it’s three pills twice a day. Once after breakfast and then again after dinner. I’ve been down the chemo road before but each time is different.

I’m not sure how quickly this takes effect. This morning I felt just fine. No issues. Tonight though within an hour I got lightheaded. Now I’m well aware this could be psychosomatic. And in the current corona virus world it could be something entirely different. All I know is I feel like a Mac truck hit me.

There’s no way to prepare for this. We haven’t told E yet as I don’t want to ruin his birthday or vacation. Having to tell him saddens me. He deserves more. Chris deserves more and fuck…I deserve more. But we press on.

It’s just another treatment path. Remain positive and optimistic. Rest when needed. And power through. It’s what we do. So tomorrow I’m hoping this was just my body adjusting to the medication (poison). And I send a prayer to my body to heal. Kill those cancer cells on my bones and liver. And God give me the strength I need to battle yet again.

Tonight though I rest…per Chris’s orders. And snuggle my family. Tomorrow’s a new day.