This week started out as every week starts out for me. Coffee, deciding wig or scarf, and then scooting out the door to work before the family wakes. I was feeling off all weekend but chalked it up to chemo. The morning task at work was to work on one of the many projects my boss assigned to be and let’s be honest that I raised my hand for. Normally focused I just couldn’t get my head into it and was feeling muddled. Long morning short, I finally stated that I might need to go to the hospital.

Foggy brain = hospital? Well when you rarely get side effucks it does. Alarms were going off in my head that something was not right. So off Chris took me to the ER. They ran a laundry list of tests, gave me fluids and sent me home to wait and rest.

4am chills unlike anything I’ve experienced. 7am 103.9 temp. 7:45am ER. And from there my first ambulance ride to Marshfield. My EMTs, Steve and Corey, kept me smiling and engaged the entire time. Once in Marshfield I was wheeled to a room with a view. In fact Steve made sure to point out the irony of giving a stage 4 cancer patient a view of the cemetery.

The next 5 days were filled with fear, sadness, hope and gratefulness. I was septic. My port got infected and spread infection through my blood and into my lungs. The first three days/nights saw ice packs to keep my temp from the soaring 104, surgery to remove my infected port and antibiotics. I cried nonstop and in my heart I thought I’d never see my family again. I questioned God and was angry with my broken body. It was hell.

By the fourth day they had placed a pic line in for the antibiotics and future chemo. I was up walking. By Saturday I was stable enough to go home. It felt like two weeks when in reality it was less than a week. I was lucky. And I wouldn’t have made it without the most unlikely family….my team of medical professionals.

From the beginning with Steve and Corey; I was surrounded by compassion, dark humor and honesty. My nurses were angels and I don’t use that lightly. The first night I had Lori on her knees next to my bed praying over me with tears falling. There was Hailey who would sit at the foot of my bed telling me of how she was preparing her yard for the adoption of a fox. Stacey…my normal night nurse that was honest with my prognosis and shared funny stories about her family. The list goes on. My doctors….each one an expert in their field brought more than diagnosis. They brought laughter and smiles. My primary physician, Dr Medani, listened compassionately to me as I cried and reassured me that I wasn’t done with this world yet. My infectious disease doctor, Dr Tompkins, bounced in every morning wearing a bow tie and smile. His smile was more infectious than the diseases he covers. Even my surgeons added light hearted ness to the situation.

In our mad covid world, being in the hospital for an extended stay away from family and friends is heartbreaking. Yes there is technology but I think of the elderly whom perhaps don’t have smart phones to face time that are alone to fight any number of ailments. The emotional support is equally as important to healing as the medical support. In fact in many cases more important. Having a team of care providers like the ones at Marshfield, is vitally important to patients. Empathy, compassion, support, prayers, love and honesty. All things we want and typically have in our families and friends. And all things I received from my care providers. An unlikely family.

When you see the signs in windows with hearts or stating that our health providers are heroes, say a prayer or whisper a thank you. Those individuals are heroes and so much more. They are angels on earth and for hopefully a brief time family to those you love.

Thank you to my nurses, doctors, Jane from food service that made me eat, and my emts for making sure I got back home to my boys.

Next post will be about the overwhelming support that my family and friends provided and are continuing to provide on my long path to full recovery. ♥️

Updated…I lost a day somewhere! Thought today was Saturday!!